For myself? No. I feel sorry for the people that Jason… that I’ve hurt.
Solitude | Landon and Willow
The silence that traveled around them for such a long period of time made her feel incredibly awkward. But then again, this whole situation was incredibly awkward. Here she was - sitting across from the love of her life, who was dead, who had another personality, who cheated on her, with someone she hated. Even though she didn’t say it out loud, it was still so weird for her to think about. Everything that she had once thought could never be was actually happening. Don’t believe in ghosts? Come to Castle Grove. Don’t believe in evil? Come to Castle Grove. Don’t believe in possible love? She couldn’t even think about the rest of that. As much as she hated this place and everything that had happened, she had found him here. And as much as he had hurt her, she couldn’t imagine her life without him.
Stop it Willow. Remember what he did to you?
Willow wasn’t hearing voices like Landon, no, this was her own voice. Her conscience speaking loud and clear. It had been popping up more than usual lately. “It’s okay. It is sort of strange.” She gave a faint nod, a faint smile on her lips, her eyes looking around the room in childlike confusion. He was now sitting a little farther away from her, glad that nobody else was in the room. She couldn’t imagine if the others thought she was talking to herself. Up to the tower she’d go.
I miss you. Those three little words rang in her ears. Like a drum beating right beside her. She felt as if her own eardrum would burst. “I miss you too.” She didn’t even hesitate. Didn’t even think about it before she let it slip through the crack. She couldn’t tell it she was angry or happy about admitting it but she did. And she was being honest.
Landon could have sworn that his breath caught in his throat. And despite not needing it any longer, he was still surprised by her words, almost finding it impossible to force his throat to stop constricting. She missed him. Sure, it wasn’t the same as being forgiven, but it was a hell of a lot better than the alternative. Eternal hatred and never being acknowledged again. But he couldn’t help himself, letting a tiny smile grace his features.
He forced it away though, after he realized she might not approve. “I… I would say I’m sorry again, but I know words don’t have that much effect or power,” he finally spoke once more, voice laced with guilt. His eyes had a hard time staying on her, her expression a constant reminder of what he did. He wished he could take it back and rewind time. Fight harder. Come back and stop Jason. “But I still think you need to hear it… so.. I’m sorry.”
He knew it was pathetic. The whole thing. Him and his neediness and the way he had dragged her down into this hell of his. Sometimes he hated the thought that she could be with someone else. Someone who made her happy and could help her. Give her what she wanted and needed. But then he thought of life without her and how, selfishly, he didn’t want her to get better. Because that meant she would leave him. That meant she wouldn’t be here, to keep him sane.
(Source: redemption-comes, via willowp-deactivated20120322)
… What kind of question is that? I’d die for her.
Scuba diving?
Can I scuba with you?
Yes. Scuba diving. Depends on how deep you can go.
(Source: redemption-comes, via kylexjensen-deactivated20120128)
A…leathersuit?
Yeah. You know. Scuba Diving…
(Source: redemption-comes, via kylexjensen-deactivated20120128)
Solitude | Landon and Willow
Her face stayed expressionless. Actually, she wasn’t even sure what emotion was running through her. Part of her wanted to just ask him to leave, to never return and let her live her life without him. But another wanted him to hug her, hold her, do anything it took to make her feel alive again. But she remained still, her eyes just keeping gaze on his. He was thinking a lot, as usual, and she wondered what crossed his mind. She wondered what he came here for, if he just wanted to say his sorry and never speak to her again. It was sort of driving her crazy. Willow was being indecisive and she knew it. God, he still looked good. She hated herself for saying that. For even thinking it. But she did…
“N-no. I’m alright.” She shook her head, the volume of her voice matching with his. She was cold actually but didn’t want him to know she was. Willow just wished that Landon would think she was perfectly fine. As if nothing had happened and that they both didn’t know one another. And in a way, it was like that. She almost felt stranger to the person in front of her, though, the two shared things that she had never shared with anyone before. She never opened up as much as she did with Landon. She never took such a chance with someone before. She let him see her for everything she was and she took a chance..even with her virginity. She swallowed hard, refusing to let her mind wander to that. She refused to let herself break in front of his eyes. She couldn’t think of that little detail. It made her heart break even more.
She watched as he tore off his cardigan, wishing she could hold her heart together as one whole piece. But the way he showed that he still cared about her. No, she’d lose it. “No, no.” She whispered, her eyes dropping to look at her own body. She shook her head, biting the inside of her cheek. “I’m fine, really. Just getting..comfortable, I guess.”
Letting his hand drop to his side, Landon nodded, trying to keep his expression from seeming a bit hurt. He had no right to feel that way. Besides, maybe he was just being paranoid and she honestly wasn’t cold. Though something told him that she honestly was; he had known her for q short amount of time, but he felt as if he were close enough to realize when she was lying straight to his face. With a semi-awkward nod, he reluctantly slid the cardigan back on, probably donning the expression of a kicked puppy.
With a small sigh, he kicked his foot against the floor a few times, the front of his shoe making a few marks before he stopped, realizing how painfully awkward he was being. This wasn’t right. This silence between them that rang in his ears, making the ability to think almost impossible. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Your fault. Shouldn’t have been so weak, then. You’re pathetic.
The voices had never stopped, since their dismal conversation had started, but he still ignored them. The last thing he wanted was for her to know that they had returned. Or that they had been there in the first place. Moving a few steps, he returned to where he had been sitting before he revealed himself, composed with a slightly hunched over appearance. “I would ask how you’ve been but that sounds so… strange,” he admitted, eyes focused on the table, instead of her. The next part of his sentence took some debate. He weighed the pros and cons and finding that no matter what happened, he would probably make a fool of himself, he glanced up at her for a moment and said it. “I miss you.”
(Source: redemption-comes, via willowp-deactivated20120322)
So… I can’t see Tommy anymore..
He’s… bad for my health, apparently.
I think I need a hug.
Oh, sorry. Was I supposed to care?
(via gil-n-brent-deactivated20120306)
My name is Landon. I enjoy reading, birds, tea and sleeping. Coincidentally, I also think about killing people. I would have been in my last year of high school by now, if I hadn't let the voices take over. Now I live in a place called Castlegrove. It's where they send the crazies.
